Because I’m a woman

What has touched me the most in the last few days -ever since the false accusation in the child labour case -is the immense support i have received from my family friends and neighbours and everybody else.

Non stop calls asking me if I’m okay,if i need any help, friends voluntering to take Kaveri out for a pizza so i can recover from the sudden high fever that came on due to stress and relax a bit, parents taking over the task of doing her studies( her first terms are on)  neighbours dropping in with husbands and sons in tow asking me to give them a shout should the need arise and sending me food and treats, NGO’s calling up to ask if i need them to publically vouch for me, my old maid calling me from abroad(where she took up a job last year) to ask me if I am okay and that she’s coming back to India in december so i shoudlnt worry-“you tell them I am 50!!-why are they saying such bad things about you?”?  🙂

I feel blessed. For all the goodness i have accumulated in my life. I also feel strong. Stronger than I have ever felt in my life though in a different way

And grateful for all the lovely women who offered me food and comfort and the strong powerful men around me who made me feel I’m not alone and they are just a phone call away and could change even change government policy should the need arise!
I told them not to worry and that I’m okay.Because for the first time in my life i felt i could handle it myself.  For all the impression of me as a suffragette and a libber that many people have-if there’s anything i miss the most in my life its the strength of a protective masculine arm around me. First it was my daddy who looked after everything and then my husband and now…this incident in a way was a test. And I am happy i have passed

Most of my male friends have been asking me why I didnt react with more agression or anger. Why i didnt take the labour ministry or the NGO to task. Why i let it go so easy. They are so angry on my behalf its a bit overwhelming- but sweet. I feel better and grateful for the male energy that protects me.

But my only answer to that is “Because I’m a woman” I have tried it your way for centuries and i know it dosent work
And because i dont beleive in agression. I no longer beleive in reacting in anger. I have done that -in the way prescribed by you in the past and the only person thats been hurt with my anger is me and the whole world around me. Anger leads to war. Who wants that?
As a woman and a mother i just want to lead a regular dignified life and look after my child to the best of my ability and create an enviornment of love and goodness and peace and honesty. I dont want jhadga-i want shanti-i want khushi

ANd though I am not able to exercise these lofty ideals always-I make an effort. Because i beleive it will triumph. If my non agressive stance is misundersttod my some cynics I think its okay-becaue i believe like the bible says that “the meek will inherit the earth”.
Only because the agressive would have all killed each other in the meantime and that maybe a time worth waiting for

Actually aggression is a relative thing too. Its expressed differently
The most aggressive thing i can do is to write a poem or a blog or make an evocative painting. I beleive its equally if not more  effective  

And i find that a better alternative. Because a womans intrinsic nature is to  create and not destroy and i try to tap into the primordial force. With every setback with every adversity i will create more and more-be it music, literature , art and what not.

And you know what-I love how powerful that makes me feel
“because I’m a woman”

22 thoughts on “Because I’m a woman”

  1. yeah thts true !!
    Letting go is one of the hardest lessons in life,
    Yet over changing seasons and passing time,
    You will have to learn to let go of certain
    People, relationships, situations and things,
    That fall way beyond your control.
    Tenacity and the attitude of not giving up,
    Work wonders on many occasions but not all,
    As some things just are not meant to be,
    No matter how hard you fight and cling to them,
    And forcing your will upon things just repel them further.

    There will always be people,
    Who will turn out in ways you never expected,
    And it dawns on you that you have to let them go,
    So that they can fulfill their destinies,
    While you go on to fulfill your own life path.

    As life likes to dish out surprises and challenges,
    Sometimes it is only through letting go,
    When your heart cries in anguish,
    That in the agonizing process that you realize,
    What is truly worth holding onto.

    Letting go does not signify weakness,
    As it might take more courage to let go than holding on,
    Like the big, inflexible tree that snaps in the storm,
    While tiny blades of grasses yield and live on,
    Revealing the strength of letting go.

  2. Dear Suchitra,
    Today’s post in your blog was one of the best.
    I totally agree with you that everytime anger is not the solution.Infact it leads to nore problems for the future.How truly Mahatma Gandhi said”An eye for an eye makes the whole world go blind”.I think it is the time in life when you are in a process to understand your inner self.Everyone of us have a very nice and beautiful Atma whose nature is basically like God.But it is only in options{living everyday life} the Atma becomes polluted.It is the time to clear the polluted Atma by the God like Atma which is deep inside.Then all the problems get dissolved.
    Yes,you are very powerful because you are a great woman.God bless you and your child.



  3. Once a womans shakti rises she is invincible. She becomes a godess

    All subjugation of women through the centuries has been due to a fear of this shakti -because it would force men to change the way they thought and acted and that was very inconvenient for them.

    thank god the world is changing and thank god for women like you. May your tribe increase

  4. Suchitra- Have always liked you from the beginning, u seem to be a sweet, intelligent girl. quick question- what is ur mothertongue? what language do u speak w/ur parents at home? could you please respond in ur blog………..thx

  5. These ideals are lofty -but it seems to be working for you
    so maybe worth a try 🙂
    God bless you and your daughter

  6. Hi suchitra how ru? big fan of urs and howz life going, i read a few years bak that ur a good painter.
    will u show me some of ur paintings…

  7. controlling anger happens after anger happens.if u can train urself not to get
    angry,no matter whatever provocation takes place,you have attained real inner is amusing to look at the outer world and the dramas that take place
    around,listen and absorb.see how u change!
    you are on the right path.

  8. Now what do you want to prove here? That a female is better than a man.

    If you think so, you are wrong. Here are some reasons men are better than females.

    1. The fastest 100 meter runner is a man.
    2. The best chess players are men.
    3. The best mathematicians and computer scientists are men.
    4. The best tennis players are men.
    5. 99.9% Nobel laureates are men.

    Need I say anything more?

  9. Arindam

    you have left me speechless with your wisdom!!! how old are you and what do you do? How can we women even dream to be equal or better to men like you-the champions and masters of tennis chess
    maths and sports!! nobel laureates too!! OMG! awesome!

    I would like to reccomend some childrens or gaming websites to you-

    Suchitras blog is all girltalk-baaah! perhaps not your cup of tea 🙂

  10. Nisha,

    Stop being a child and stop whining. You seems to be lacking in grey matters. Have you ever indulged in any kind of activities, which require applying your brain – like math or chess? I guess not.

  11. Arindham n Kunal… xu need the answer for what women are best at?the best answer can be given to u by sm1 very close to you,sm1 whom u luk upto, sm1 who has been there with u everytime,with all the love in this world… u cn ask ur mother… n definitely she’l tell u that a women cn give life… dnt frget the pains n hardships they face. definitely men too hv hardships bt there r thghngs that men can nt even attempt forget about being a champ…
    u cannot generalize things being gender biased, there r foolish men on this planet as well…

  12. Ansul,

    “there r foolish men on this planet as well…”

    I totally agree. you are one of them.

    giving birth can’t be thought of as a great qualification.

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